Size Only Matters If You Let It

I love Palm Springs – the Coachella music festival (it might be filled with 20-year-old Aussies, but don’t laugh – I played EDM at my wedding!), the midcentury modern architecture, the abundance of golf and tennis, and lazy days spent at the Parker pool truly make it an oasis in the desert.

But you can’t visit the Coachella Valley without hitting one of the premier shopping destinations in southern California – the Cabazon outlets! Next to those two iconic dinosaurs on the 10 (because in SoCal it’s “the” 10), the Cabazon outlets, with their variety of stores for every style and budget, are a true shopper’s paradise.

Naturally, my first stop was Tory Burch Sport to stock up on all the golf, tennis and resort wear I could find. And bonus: everything was on sale. Like any good shopper, I started my adventure by snagging whatever I liked on the rack without checking the sizes first (with an opportunity like that, you grab first, check later). In the dressing room, I was pleased to notice that an extra small golf skort fit me to a T… and less than a minute later, shocked to see that an extra large tennis sweater was equally flattering. 

After I got over the initial disappointment by telling myself I was an extra small less than a minute ago, I began to wonder: why do we, as women, have such an emotional response to the size of clothes we wear? If we can just as easily be a size two as a size 10, why do we even care about such a fickle measurement?

Years ago, a friend who worked in the fashion industry told me that jeans sizes are a total scam. Because some companies cut their denim in stacks, a size four at the top of the stack is a bit smaller than the size four at the bottom. Logically, size really shouldn’t matter, but emotionally, we feel so much better when we can opt for the smaller size.

One of my friends recently told me about an experience she had cleaning out her closet before a big move. In it, she found everything from a size four to a size 14, and she wears every size with grace and creativity. 

The thing about her is, she’s actually fine with the body she has. She focuses more on how she feels, and because of that, dresses herself in styles that suit her personality rather than rejecting certain brands just because she happens to run large in their sizes. I admire that outlook. Fashion should be about what suits your personality and the amazing body that you have. Just as you shouldn’t be a slave to a particular label, you shouldn’t be a slave to a particular size.

This whole experience reminded me of a quote from “Eat Pray Love,” when Julia Roberts’ character asks her weight-conscious friend, “In all the years you’ve undressed in front of a gentleman, has he asked you to leave? Has he ever walked out and left? No. Because he doesn’t care. He’s in the room with a naked girl. He’s won the lottery.”

Think about it. You have a body that can do amazing things regardless of size, and a mind that can motivate you to accomplish anything. Let’s strive to place more emotional value on that.

You’ve won the lottery.