The Art of Living
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?”
Every once in a while, you’re reminded that life is finite. I had one such moment recently, and it’s prompted me to double down on my #OnlyJoy mantra — only investing my time and energy in those things that enrich, amaze, and bring joy into my life.
This doesn’t mean I live in denial, and I haven’t become a pleasure-seeking nihilist. I still read the newspaper, vote, and go to work every day. But I have made a conscious decision to spend as many of my precious hours on this planet doing things I love with people I love.
We are each given the same 24 hours in a day, and it’s up to us how we spend those 24 hours. I choose to spend mine nurturing my most important relationships, supporting causes I’m passionate about, doing work that’s important and challenging, taking care of my body, and surrounding myself with beauty and art.
Conversely, because I find it unfulfilling (and I have a hard time sitting still), I almost never watch television. I also limit my time on social media because it can have the same effect. (And if you battle depression, you should definitely limit your social media consumption, as it contributes to FOMO and comparison anxiety.)
Every day is a fresh canvas. How will you paint yours today? Here are the some of the ways I try to maximize #OnlyJoy.
Stop and notice: There’s beauty all around you, whether it’s appreciating the blissful napping of your dog in a patch of sunlight, or a particularly blue sky.
Appreciate normal. Whenever I get a cold or my allergies are acting up, I just want to breathe normally again. I try to remember that when things are just “fine” and not take “fine” for granted. Life can turn on a dime: A tornado can hit your neighborhood. A car can run a red light. A loved one can get a bad medical diagnosis. Yesterday’s “meh” might be tomorrow’s “if only.” So, bathe in the miracle of your normal life.
Soak up art: Art is all around us, whether it’s music, paintings, sculpture, film, literature, or any another medium. Creativity and self-expression — even when it’s challenging — is life itself. I’m at my happiest when I’m surrounded by and discovering new art.
Connect with others: If I’m having a bad day, I make a special effort to reach out to others. That might be close family and friends, or it might be the cashier at the grocery store or the Uber driver. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve been cheered up by making a personal connection and getting to know a fellow human just a little bit better.
Nature makes everything better: I’m not an adherent of “grounding,” but they may be onto something because I always feel better when I spend some time in nature. That might be a nature-centric vacation, but sometimes it’s just a golf outing or spending time in my backyard.
I opened this essay with a quote from Mary Oliver’s poem, “The Summer Day,” because she captures the awe and wonder of the natural world we should all have. If you haven’t read any of her poems or essays, you should definitely add her to your reading list. I challenge you to spend an hour reading anything by her and not see the world through new eyes.
I’ll close with this from “Winter Hours,” her book of essays and poems:
“I would say that there exist a thousand unbreakable links between each of us and everything else, and that our dignity and our chances are one. The farthest star and the mud at our feet are a family; and there is no decency or sense in honoring one thing, or a few things, and then closing the list. The pine tree, the leopard, the Platte River, and ourselves—we are at risk together, or we are on our way to a sustainable world together. We are each other’s destiny.”
#OnlyJoy
—Kathleen