Choosing Joyful Anticipation over Dreadful Anticipation

I love the holidays, but I also know they can be stressful. For every warm, fuzzy moment — your apple pies, holiday movies, and hugs from beloved friends and family — there’s at least one that fills me with a certain amount of dread — lines at the airport, the relative you always seem to clash with, and that ubiquitousChristmas song by The Waitresses that makes me want to throw myself out of a moving car.

I recently wrote about the power of anticipation, and the holidays are a good time to remind myself that it can go both ways. So, whenever I start thinking about the stressful part of the holidays, I remind myself of the transformative power of shifting my focus from dreadful anticipation to joyful anticipation.

Studies show that joyful anticipation of an upcoming positive event actually boosts our mood in the here and now. Our brains bathe in neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin, creating a pleasant buzz that spills over into our daily interactions. Conversely, fixating on potential holiday hassles throws us into a negative feedback loop, amplifying anxieties and souring our present joy.

So, how do we flip the script on holiday dread? First, I like to take inventory of my anticipation triggers. If I have a trip coming up, that might be crowded airports. So, instead of picturing interminable queues and grumpy travelers, I'm visualizing efficient check-in, maybe even a spontaneous upgrade (hey, universe!), and catching up on a juicy novel with a latte in hand. The airport becomes a haven for relaxation, not a crucible of frustration.

Next, I actively cultivate joyful anticipation. Picture that perfect holiday dinner: laughter echoing around the table, warm candlelight on smiling faces, and the aroma of apple pie enveloping us like a hug. Imagine unwrapping thoughtful gifts. Visualize cozy evenings wrapped in blankets, hot cocoa in hand, watching holiday classics with loved ones. Let these vivid mental images wash over you, their warmth seeping into your present moments.

And here's the secret sauce: make these joyful anticipations actionable. Plan a playlist for your holiday travels, one that fills you with cheer instead of anxiety (we know what song I’ll be leaving off my playlist). Pick out a “just for fun” novel to read during your downtime. Schedule a spa visit before — or even after — the shopping frenzy. Small actions, fueled by joyful anticipation, become stepping stones to a more fulfilling season.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not sugarcoating reality. Lines will exist, your aunt will still have problematic opinions, and you’ll probably spend more money than you planned. But by prioritizing joyful anticipation, we equip ourselves with emotional armor.

We choose to see the potential beauty in the chaos, the warmth in the flurry, and the laughter in the midst of wrapping paper battles. It's not about ignoring challenges, but about choosing the lens through which we view them.

This holiday season, let's break free from the tyranny of dreadful anticipation and step into the holidays with an open heart and a ready smile. The magic awaits, not just in the future, but within the joyful anticipation of its arrival.