Nurturing the Power of Anticipation
If you’re like most Americans, you’re probably planning a trip in the next few months. Not only is this the peak travel season, but this is the first summer in three years that international travel hasn’t been hampered by Covid — whether the actual disease or the need to get tested before re-entering the U.S.
Your impending travel — or whatever fun events you have in your future — are a great opportunity to practice my favorite new tool: anticipation.
Truth be told, I’ve always done this without giving it much thought. But a story I read last year in The New York Times has made me more intentional and mindful about how I practice anticipation. Psychologists tell us that anticipating a fun event in the future can improve our mood in the moment, so I look for opportunities to think about those special events in the future and work that anticipation into my day.
I have a trip coming up in a few weeks, so I like to spend a few minutes each day either planning my wardrobe, researching fun things to do, making dinner reservations, picturing myself enjoying myself in my destination, and generally getting myself psyched up for the trip. Just those few minutes each day put a smile on my face and give me the boost I sometimes need to make it through a not-always-scintillating conference call.
I know some people make an effort not to make anticipation part of their lives, saying they don’t want to get themselves so worked up about something that might let them down. And I understand their reasoning: If you don’t have high expectations, you’ll never be disappointed. At the same time, those people are actively missing out on the dopamine hit they would experience right now if they would simply give in to the joy of anticipating their trip or special event.
No Vacay Coming Up? No Problem!
I don’t always have a vacation coming up, so I find ways to build anticipation of smaller events. That might be dinner with my husband at our favorite restaurant, movie night with girlfriends, or a chilled glass of wine on my patio after a long day.
Still, because I like to have something big to look forward to, I always like to have something special to look forward to. So, if there’s no fun trip or party on the horizon, I get one on the books!
I even use anticipation to get myself over motivational humps. If I don’t feel like working out, for example, I put myself in the mind of Future Kathleen (even if that’s just one hour into the future) and remind myself how good I always feel after a solid workout. Or if I’m procrastinating on a project, I remind myself how happy I’ll be to have it completed.
There’s even research showing that anticipating a positive event can help people endure a stressful task or event, such as public speaking. So, if you have a stressful event coming up, schedule something delightful afterward (e.g. a massage or a nice dinner) and remind yourself of your future treat whenever you feel stress over the less pleasant event. I haven’t tried this out yet, but I’ll give it a test run and report back.
If you’ve been living by the adage to not get too excited about trips or other special events — because you don’t want to be disappointed — you might want to change it up for a bit. You may very well find that the joy you get from anticipation outweighs the potential downside of the event not living up to your expectations.
Let me know how it goes!
#OnlyJoy
Kathleen